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[Debate/Åä·Ð] (HM-066) Girl eager for independence isn£§t prepared to pay for it
ÃÖ°í°ü¸®ÀÚ  |  19-05-05 23:55
Çѱ¹¾î·Î µÈ ¹®Á¦¸¦ º¸¸é¼­, ¿µ¾î·Î´Â ¾î¶»°Ô Ç¥ÇöÀÌ µÇ´ÂÁö¸¦ »ý°¢ÇØ º¸¼¼¿ä.
¿ø¾î¹ÎÀÇ Ç¥Çö°ú, Çѱ¹ »ç¶÷µéÀÌ ÈçÈ÷ »ý°¢ÇÒ ¼ö Àִ ǥÇöÀÇ Â÷À̸¦ º¸¸é¼­
»ì¾Æ Àִ ǥÇö, ¶Ñ·ÇÇÑ ÀÇ»ç Àü´ÞÀÇ ±â¼úÀ» ¹è¿ì½Ã±æ ¹Ù¶ø´Ï´Ù. 

[Problem]

ÀúÀÇ 18»ì ³­ µþÀº Áö±Ý ¸· °íµîÇб³¸¦ Á¹¾÷Çß½À´Ï´Ù. µþ¾Ö´Â ÀÌÁ¦ °¸ À̾ °®°í ÇØ¿Ü¿©ÇàÇϱ⿡ ÃæºÐÇÑ µ·À» ¸ðÀ¸±â À§ÇØ ÀÏÀ» ÇÏ°í ½Í¾î ÇÕ´Ï´Ù. ¹®Á¦´Â ¾ó¸¶³ª ÁýÀ» ¹þ¾î³ª±â¸¦ ¿øÇÏ´ÂÁö ´Ù¸¥ µµ½Ã·Î ¿Å°Ü °¡¼­ ÀÏÇÏ°í ½Í¾îÇÕ´Ï´Ù.    
My 18-year-old daughter has just finished school. She now wants to take a gap year and work to save enough to travel overseas. The problem is, she's so eager to get away from home that she wants to move to another city to work.

Àú´Â µþ¿¡°Ô Áý¿¡ ÀÖÀ¸¸é¼­ ÀÏÇÏ¸é ¿©ÇàÀ» À§ÇØ ´õ ¸¹ÀÌ ÀúÃàÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖÀ» °ÍÀε¥ (ÁýÀ» ¶°³ª »ì¸é) ½Äºñ, ¼÷¹Úºñ¿Í ±³Åëºñ¸¦ ºÎ´ãÇØ¾ß ÇÏ°í, ±×·¯¸é ¿©ÇàÇÏ´Â µ¥ ÀúÃàÇÒ °ÍÀÌ °ÅÀÇ ³²Áö ¾ÊÀ» °ÍÀ̶ó°í Ãæ°íÇÑ ÀûÀÌ ÀÖ¾î¿ä. µþ¾Ö´Â Á¦°Ô È­¸¦ ³ÂÀ¸¸ç ¿Ö Á¦°¡ ÀÚ½ÅÀÇ Áý¼¼¸¦ ³»·Á ÇÏÁöµµ, Áö¿øÇÏ·Á ÇÏÁöµµ ¾Ê´ÂÁö ÀÌÇØÇÏÁö ¸øÇß½À´Ï´Ù. µþÀÌ ÁýÀ» ³ª°£´Ù¸é ³²¿¡°Ô ±â´ëÁö ¾Ê°í »ì¾Æ¾ß ÇÑ´Ù°í ¸»ÇÏ´Â Á¦°¡ Å͹«´Ï ¾ø´Â ÁþÀ» ÇÏ°í ÀÖ´Â °Ç°¡¿ä? - ³²¾ÆÇÁ¸®Ä«°øÈ­±¹ ¿äÇϳ׽º¹ö±×ÀÇ ÇÑ ¾ö¸¶ 
I have advised her that staying home and working will allow her to save more to travel, and she would have to pay for her food, accommodation and transportation, and would have little left over to save to travel. She got upset with me and could not understand why I wouldn't want to pay her rent or support her. Am I being unreasonable saying that she should pay her own way if she moves out of the home? - MOM IN JOHANNESBURG, SOUTH AFRICA 

[Advice]

¾î¸Ó´Ï µ¶ÀÚ´Ô²²: ´©±º°¡ Ư±ÇÀǽÄÀÌ ¹Ì±¹¿¡ ÇÑÁ¤µÈ ¹®Á¦¶ó°í »ý°¢ÇÑ´Ù¸é µ¶ÀÚ´ÔÀÇ ÆíÁö¾ß¸»·Î ±×·± °ü³äÀ» ºÒ½Ä½Ãų °ÍÀÔ´Ï´Ù. µû´Ô¿¡°Ô ÇϽŠµ¶ÀÚ´ÔÀÇ ¸»¾¸Àº ÀüÀûÀ¸·Î Ÿ´çÇÕ´Ï´Ù. µû´ÔÀÌ µ¶¸³À» ¿øÇÑ´Ù¸é ±×·¸°Ô »ç´Â °Í¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã¥ÀÓÀ» ¹Þ¾ÆµéÀÏ Áغñ°¡ µÇ¾î ÀÖ¾î¾ß ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.  
DEAR MOM: If anyone thinks that an attitude of entitlement is strictly a problem in the United States, your letter should banish that notion. What you told your daughter makes perfect sense. If she wants independence, she should be prepared to accept the responsibility for living that way.

ÇÏÁö¸¸ Àú´Â µû´ÔÀÌ ¿Ö µ¶ÀÚ´Ô¿¡°Ô¼­ ¶³¾îÁ® »ì Çʿ伺À» ´À³¢´ÂÁö µ¶ÀÚ´Ô²²¼­ ÀÌÇØÇÏ½Ç ¼ö ÀÖµµ·Ï, ±×¸®°í È­ÇØ°¡ °¡´ÉÇÒ ¼öµµ ÀÖ´Ù´Â ±â´ë¸¦ Ç°°í µû´Ô°ú ´ëÈ­¸¦ °è¼ÓÇÏ½Ã±æ °Ý·ÁÇÏ°íÀÚ ÇÕ´Ï´Ù. Àú´Â ±×°ÍÀÌ ±ú¿ìħÀ» ÁÙ °ÍÀ̶ó°í È®½ÅÇÕ´Ï´Ù.
I would, however, encourage you to continue the dialogue with her so you can understand why she feels the need to live apart from you, on the chance that a compromise might be possible. I'm sure it would be enlightening.

[¾îÈÖ & Ç¥Çö]

* gap year °¸ À̾î(°íµîÇб³¸¦ Á¹¾÷ÇÏ°í ´ëÇÐ ÀÔÇÐ Àü 1³â°£ ¶Ç´Â ´ëÇÐ Á¹¾÷ ÈÄ ´ëÇпø ÁøÇÐ ¶Ç´Â 
Ãë¾÷ Àü¿¡ 1³â°£ ¿©Çà, ÀÚ¿øºÀ»ç µî ´Ù¾çÇÑ È°µ¿À» üÇèÇÏ¿© ÀÚ½ÅÀÌ ³ª¾Æ°¥ ¹æÇâÀ» ¼³Á¤ÇÏ´Â ±â°£) 
(=A gap year is a period of time during which a student takes a break from studying after they have finished school 
and before they start college or university) 
e.g.) I went around the world in my gap year. ³ª´Â °¸ ÀÌ¾î µ¿¾È ¼¼»óÀ» µ¹¾Æ´Ù³æ´Ù. 
 
* get away from ¹þ¾î³ª´Ù, Å»ÃâÇÏ´Ù, ºüÁ®³ª°¡´Ù
e.g.) I just want to get away from this city life. ³­ ÀÌ µµ½Ã »ýÈ°¿¡¼­ ¹þ¾î³ª°íÆÄ. 
 
* get upset with È­³»´Ù, ¼Ó»óÇØ ÇÏ´Ù 
e.g.) But sometimes he gets upset with me, too. ±×·¯³ª ¶§¶§·Î ±×´Â ³ª¿¡°Ô ¶ÇÇÑ È­³»±âµµ ÇØ. 
 
* pay one's own way ºúÁöÁö ¾Ê°í »ì¾Æ°¡´Ù, ³²¿¡°Ô ±â´ëÁö ¾Ê°í »ì´Ù 
e.g.) Are you able to pay your own way? ÀÚ¸³ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ°Ú´Ï?  
 
* attitude of entitlement Ư±ÇÀÇ½Ä (= someone's attitude that they have the official right to have or receive something)
 e.g.) Some children have an attitude of entitlement to their parents' full support in their life. 
 
* banish (ÁÖ·Î ¼öµ¿ÅÂ)¸ô¾Æ³»´Ù, Ãß¹æÇÏ´Ù, (°ÆÁ¤, ±Ù½É) ¶³ÃĹö¸®´Ù, 
e.g.) I'll banish all troubles from you. ³»°¡ ³ÊÀÇ ¸ðµç °ñÄ©°Å¸®¸¦ ¾ø¾Ö ÁÖ°Ú´Ù.
 
* on the chance that ~À» Àº±ÙÈ÷ ±â´ëÇÏ°í, Ȥ½Ã ~ÇÒÁöµµ ¸ð¸¥´Ù°í »ý°¢ÇÏ°í 
(= to do something hoping for a particular result, although you know it is not likely) 
e.g.) He bought the car on the chance that his dad might pay for it. ¾Æ¹öÁö°¡ µ·À» ³»ÁÙ °ÍÀ» ±â´ëÇÏ°í ±×´Â ±× Â÷¸¦ »ò´Ù.

* enlightening (°Ý½Ä) °è¸ùÀûÀÎ, ¹àÇô ÁÖ´Â, ±ú¿ìÄ¡´Â (=explaining something to someone so that they understand)
e.g.) It is an enlightening and enjoyable book. ±×°ÍÀº ±ú¿ìħÀ» Áֱ⵵ ÇÏÁö¸¸ Àç¹ÌÀÖ°Ô ÀÐÀ» ¼ö Àִ åÀÌ´Ù.