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[Debate/Åä·Ð] (HM-052) Woman discovers man£§s eyes aren£§t wandering by accident
ÃÖ°í°ü¸®ÀÚ  |  19-01-04 00:35
Çѱ¹¾î·Î µÈ ¹®Á¦¸¦ º¸¸é¼­, ¿µ¾î·Î´Â ¾î¶»°Ô Ç¥ÇöÀÌ µÇ´ÂÁö¸¦ »ý°¢ÇØ º¸¼¼¿ä.
¿ø¾î¹ÎÀÇ Ç¥Çö°ú, Çѱ¹ »ç¶÷µéÀÌ ÈçÈ÷ »ý°¢ÇÒ ¼ö Àִ ǥÇöÀÇ Â÷À̸¦ º¸¸é¼­
»ì¾Æ Àִ ǥÇö, ¶Ñ·ÇÇÑ ÀÇ»ç Àü´ÞÀÇ ±â¼úÀ» ¹è¿ì½Ã±æ ¹Ù¶ø´Ï´Ù.

[Problem]

Àú´Â 58¼¼·Î µÎ ¹ø ÀÌÈ¥ÇÏ¿´À¸¸ç, ºÎÁö·±ÇÑ Áß»êÃþ ¿©¼ºÀÔ´Ï´Ù. Àú´Â ÀÏ°ú ¼ºÀÎÀÌ µÈ ¼¼ ÀÚ³à¿Í ¾î¿ï¸®´Â µ¥ Á¦ ½Ã°£ÀÇ ´ëºÎºÐÀ» º¸³À´Ï´Ù. ¾à 1 ³â Àü¿¡ ¾î¶² »ç¶÷°ú µ¥ÀÌÆ®Çϱ⠽ÃÀÛÇß½À´Ï´Ù. ±×´Â 63¼¼Àε¥ ¾ÆÁÖ Àß µµ¿ÍÁÖ°í Àú¸¦ ¹ÌÄ¥ µíÀÌ »ç¶ûÇÑ´Ù°í ÁÖÀåÇϸç, ÀÌ µ¥ÀÌÆ®¸¦ Á¤»óÀûÀÌ°í °ÇÀüÇÑ ÀλýÀ» À§ÇÑ ±âȸ·Î ¿©±é´Ï´Ù. 
I am a 58-year-old, twice divorced, hard-working, middle-class female. I spend most of my time working and involved with my three adult children. About a year ago I started dating someone. He is 63, very helpful and claims he's madly in love with me and appreciates this opportunity for a normal, wholesome life.

°¡²û ±×°¡ ¿©ÀÚµéÀÇ ±ÃµÕÀ̸¦ ºþÈ÷ ÃÄ´Ùº¸´Â ¸ð½ÀÀÌ Á¦ ´«¿¡ ÀâÈü´Ï´Ù. ÀÌ°ÍÀÌ Á» ½Å°æÀÌ ¾²ÀÌÁö¸¸ ¾î¿ ¼ö ¾øÁÒ, ±×´Â ³²ÀÚÀÎ °É¿ä. Áö³­ ÁÖ¿¡ ÀúÈñ °¡Á·ÀÌ Ä·ÇÎÀ» °¬½À´Ï´Ù. Àú´Â ±×°¡ 40»ì ³­ Á¦ µþÀÇ ¾ûµ¢À̸¦ ÀÀ½ÃÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖµµ·Ï ÀÚ½ÅÀÇ À§Ä¡¸¦ ¿­ ¹øµµ ´õ ¹Ù²Ù´Â °ÍÀ» º¸¾Ò½À´Ï´Ù. À¯³äÇϼ¼¿ä, Á¦ µþÀº ¾ÆÁÖ º¸¼öÀûÀÎ ¿Ê Â÷¸²À» Çϸç, À̹ø ¿©Çà¿£ °ÅÀÇ ³»³» û¹ÙÁö¿Í Ƽ¼ÅÃ÷ Â÷¸²À̾ú½À´Ï´Ù.
Occasionally I'll catch him staring at women's butts. It bothers me a bit, but oh well, he's a man. Last week our family went camping. At least a dozen times I saw him position himself so that he could stare at my 40-year-old daughter's behind. Keep in mind, my daughter dresses VERY conservatively, and this trip was almost all jeans and T-shirts.

ÀúÈñ°¡ ÁüÀ» ´Ù ²Ù¸®°í ÁýÀ» ÇâÇØ °¥ Áغñ°¡ µÇ¾úÀ» ¶§, Á¦ µþÀÌ º¼ÀÏÀ» º¸¾Æ¾ß¸¸ ÇÏ°Ú´Ù°í ¸»ÇÏ°í´Â ´ýºÒ ¼ÓÀ¸·Î µé¾î°¬½À´Ï´Ù(ÀÌ °÷Àº ¿ÜÁø ¾ß¿µÀåÀÌ¿¡¿ä). Á¦ ³²ÀÚÄ£±¸´Â ÀúÈñ ¸ðµÎ°¡ ´Ù¸¥ ¹æÇâÀ¸·Î ½Ã¼±À» µ¹·È´ø °Í°ú´Â ´Þ¸®, Á¦ µþÀÇ ¹æÇâÀ» ¾óºüÁø µíÀÌ ÀÀ½ÃÇߴµ¥ ÈÉÃ帷Á°í ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀÌ ºÐ¸íÇß¾î¿ä!   
As we were packed up and ready to head home, she said she had to relieve herself and headed into the bushes (this is a remote campground). Instead of my boyfriend looking the other way as we all did, he stared and gawked in her direction obviously trying to sneak a peek!

¾Öºñ ¼±»ý´Ô, Àú¿¡°Õ ¾öû³­ Ãæ°ÝÀÌ¸ç ¿ª°ã½À´Ï´Ù. ÀÌ¿¡ ´ëÇØ ¼±»ý´ÔÀÇ °í°ßÀ» ºÎŹÇÕ´Ï´Ù. - ´º¿å¿¡¼­ Á¤»óÀÌ ¾Æ´Ï¸é ºñÁ¤»óÀÎ µ¶ÀÚ
Abby, I am devastated and disgusted. Please give me your take on this. - NORMAL OR NOT IN NEW YORK

[Advice]

Á¤»óÀ̽Šµ¶ÀÚ´Ô²²: ³²ÀÚ°¡ ¿©¼ºÀÇ ½Åü ºÎÀ§¸¦ ¹Ù¶óº¸´Â °ÍÀº Á¤»óÀÌÁö¸¸ µ¶ÀÚ´ÔÀÇ ³²ÀÚÄ£±¸´Â ±× Á¤µµ¸¦ ³Ñ¾ú³×¿ä. ±×°¡ µû´ÔÀÌ º¼ÀÏÀ» º¸´Â µ¿¾È ÈÉÃÄ º¸·Á Çß´Ù´Â »ç½ÇÀº ±×°¡ °üÀ½ÁõÀÌ ÀÖ´Â »ç¶÷ÀÓÀ» ³ªÅ¸³À´Ï´Ù. ÀÌÁ¦ µ¶ÀÚ´Ô²²¼­´Â ±×°¡ ´ÜÁö ±âȸ¸¦ ÀÌ¿ëÇÏ·Á°í ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀÎÁö ¾Æ´Ï¸é Àû±ØÀûÀ¸·Î ±×°ÍÀ» Ãß±¸ÇÏ´Â °ÍÀÎÁö ±¸º°ÇÏ¼Å¾ß ÇÕ´Ï´Ù. ÀÌ´Â Àå·¡¿¡ ¹®Á¦°¡ µÉ ¼öµµ Àֱ⠶§¹®ÀÌ¿¡¿ä.
DEAR NORMAL: For a man to look at women's body parts is normal, but what your boyfriend did goes beyond that. For him to try to sneak a peek at your daughter while she relieved herself indicates that he is a voyeur. Now you must determine whether he just takes advantage of an opportunity or he actively seeks it out, which could present a problem in the future.

[¾îÈÖ & Ç¥Çö]

* wander »ç¶÷ÀÇ ½Ã¼±[»ý°¢, ¸¶À½]ÀÌ (´Ù¸¥ µ¥·Î) ½ò¸®´Ù[Æȸ®´Ù] 
(= to stop paying attention to something and think about something else) 
e.g.) His eyes wandered towards the photographs on the wall. ±×´Â º®¿¡ °É¸° ±×¸²µé¿¡ ´«ÀÌ ÆÈ·Á ÀÖ¾ú´Ù.
 
* by accident ¿ì¿¬È÷ (= in a way that is not planned or intended)
 e.g.) We met by accident at the airport. ¿ì¸®´Â °øÇ׿¡¼­ ¿ì¿¬È÷ ¸¸³µ´Ù.
 
* wholesome °ÇÀüÇÑ, À¯ÀÍÇÑ (= considered to have a good moral effect)
e.g.) I do not consider magic a wholesome entertainment.  ³ª´Â ¸¶¼úÀ» °ÇÀüÇÑ ¿À¶ôÀ¸·Î ¿©±âÁö´Â ¾Ê´Â´Ù.
 
* Oh, well! ±¦Âú¾Æ!, ±×·² ¼öµµ ÀÖÁö!, ¾î¿ ¼ö ¾øÁö! 
(= oh well used to show that you accept a situation even though you feel disappointed or annoyed about it)
e.g.) Oh well, I can't help it. ±×·¡, ¾î¿ ¼ö ¾ø±º. 
 
* behind (ºñ°Ý½Ä) ¾ûµ¢ÀÌ (= a word used to mean your buttocks when you want to be polite)
e.g.) The dog bit him on his behind.°³°¡ ±×ÀÇ ¾ûµ¢À̸¦ ¹°¾ú´Ù.
 
* relieve oneself º¼ÀÏÀ» º¸´Ù(È­Àå½Ç¿¡ °¡´Â °ÍÀ» Á¤ÁßÇÏ°Ô ³ªÅ¸³¿) (= a polite expression meaning to urinate)
e.g.) I had to relieve myself behind a bush. ³ª´Â ´ýºÒ µÚ¿¡¼­ º¼ÀÏÀ» º¸¾Æ¾ß Çß´Ù.
 
* gawk (at sb/sth) (ºñ°Ý½Ä) ¾óºüÁø µíÀÌ (¸ÛÇÏ´Ï) ¹Ù¶óº¸´Ù 
(= to look at something for a long time,in a way that seems stupid)
e.g.) The crowd gawked at the man with blue hair. ±ºÁßÀº ÆĶõ ¸Ó¸®ÀÇ ³²ÀÚ¸¦ ¸ÛÇÏ´Ï ³ÌÀ» ÀÒ°í ÃÄ´Ùº¸¾Ò´Ù. 
 
* voyeur °üÀ½ÁõÀÌ ÀÖ´Â »ç¶÷ 
(= someone who gets sexual pleasure from secretly watching other people having sex or taking their clothes off)